It only happens once in a lifetime.

Last night while I was resting my head on my husbands lap I said to him, "three years ago was the last time I talked with dad".
He said,"I know".
This morning before he left the house he held me and said,"I'm thinking of your dad today".
I said "thank you".

If we had to line people up in our lives, he knew where dad stood in that line. He understood the best he could, well before we married. He never failed to show me he was o.k. with that.

Three years have not changed the past, he is still gone.
Come 8 pm tonight will mark three calendar years, he just left, just like that. No i love you's, no goodbyes, no see ya's, and no "I forgot to tell ya one more thing". When he left, he left a huge hole in our hearts, a hole I am slowy filling with memories, but a hole nonetheless.
I don't believe the pain goes away, it must be put away, placed somewhere by the survivor in us.

I loved him bigger than the world, to the moon and back thousands of times. My love for him never grew up, it didn't have to. He was the best of the best, the brightest of the stars that shine, he was my sunrise and sunset.
I am thankful this only happens once in a lifetime, you can only lose your dad once, I will never have to feel that pain again. I know that there will be "other pains" in my lifetime..i know, i know.
I really, really miss my dad, and I will never, ever stop.

Hey dad, that breakfast Manda and I had this morning was in memory of you.

Interesting article

I open my home page to read this on MSNBC.

YBOR CITY, Fla. - A southwest Florida church issued a challenge for its married members this past Sunday: Hanky-panky every day. Relevant Church head pastor Paul Wirth says the 50 percent divorce rate was the catalyst for The 30-Day Sex Challenge.

I read it to my husband who is horizontal on the couch, he mumbled something to me.

Personally, I think it's a great idea!.......I might be the only one though.

I'm not so sure it's mine anymore

Did you ever have something in your life, that you would bet your life on, was yours? I'm talking, really and truly, bet your living being on it, was yours? What this shows me now, is no matter how old I get, I don't know anything for sure, well I few things I do know for sure, but this one I don't. If you weren't born with it, it ain't yours, (could this be my new cynical motto?)The winds are changing for me, I feel it. I am as afraid as a child. I do not know what to do.

Finally, a real storm.

I remember the snow storm of 67', the city halted. I loved it. We had a close second yesterday thru last night. Blizzard winds howled, the snow seemed endless. I loved it. There is a five foot drift blocking me from leaving the garage. I am stuck home, most people are. I like it this way. My dogs love it! I am going to build a snowman with my daughters today, in fact I'm going to play all day if I choose. I hope the snow plows take their time getting out my way......I'd like to enjoy this removal from the rest of the population as long as possible. Must be the hermit in me.